 Arguments (disagreements, heated discussions, whatever you want to call them) are challenging because it’s possible for both you and your spouse to be right about the same situation.
Arguments are not like the associative law where (a+b)+c will always equal a+(b+c). Arguments are not like the law of gravity, which makes a baseball tossed in the air come down every single time without fail. Arguments just aren't that simple. They’re more like looking at a cloud, and reaching different interpretations of its shape. Is it a person, a car, an animal, something else? That’s up to personal interpretation.  Sure, you could lie to your spouse about ...
 You know where this is headed.
Don't you? If you are addicted to your phone (or any other device that is taking time away from your spouse on a consistent basis), I challenge you to give it a break this weekend. Perhaps your spouse has been telling you that you always have your face buried in your device ... updating your Facebook status, seeing what's trending on Twitter, pinning a photo, or reading messages from those Marriage Works! people (ouch!)  I continue to be amazed at (and grateful for ) all the positive comments spouses like you are leaving. I'm seeing stories of how people are ready to give up, but are hanging on. I'm reading stories of how spouses have changed, and marriages are being restored. I'm reading stories of how people are re-investigating what the Bible has to say about marriage ... their marriage.
One quality underpins each story I read, and can be the deciding factor of whether a marriage stands or falls: commitment. 
Ever feel stuck? This is for you!
Dutch artist Rembrandt once said to practice what you know, and it will help make clear what you currently don't know. As you go through the marriage life cycle, there will be plenty of times when you don't know what to do. Don't fret ... just practice what you know. 
Cetelia and I routinely talk with couples who are at their wit's end in their marriage. In fact, just last week a husband called me and told me he plans on leaving his wife. Why? Because she's not changing and can't change. In essence, he has given up hope that anything will ever be different.
Although it's easy to get on the "things are terrible and will never get better" bandwagon, there is something special about the people who will look at an impossible situation, and steadfastly believe that impossible simply means it hasn't happened...yet.  The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, “I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we’re going to be three in this house instead of two.” Her husband ran to her with a smile on his face and delight in his eyes. He was glowing of happiness and kissing his wife when she said, “I’m glad that you feel this way ... tomorrow morning my mother moves in with us.”
 Today marks the 48th anniversary of Neil Armstrong walking on the moon. His famous words, "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind," are significant where your marriage is concerned.
How many times have you seen a friend's or family member's marriage and thought, "I would love to have a marriage like that!" How many times have you seen a couple walking hand in hand or seen a couple gushing over one another and thought, "Man, they must really love each other. How do I get my marriage like that?" Let me let you in one something: you're not alone. Even though I have a great marriage, I've seen couples and thought the EXACT same thing! |
AuthorKevin B. Bullard, Marriage Works! Founder Archives
May 2018
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