Today's question comes from Johnny:
When your wife moves out to another place and she says that the reason she moved out was to get your attention? But I believe she moved out for freedom or another man.
Dear Johnny -
I once heard that the answer is in the anger, and I believe it to be true.
If your wife said she moved out to get your attention, then take it at face value, and tell her that she has your attention.
More than likely, she has been telling you over an extended period of time what upsets her and why. Consider rehearsing everything she has told you, and evaluate if you've made adjustments in those areas. Next ask HER if you've made adjustments in those areas. Her opinion (not yours) is what she's using as the measuring stick.
One thing is for certain: satisfied people generally don't break up with their satisfaction, whether it be a person, habit, or activity.
That said, it's safe to say that your wife is not satisfied with the condition of the marriage. Your job now is to consider why, what, how, and when.
Why did she move out? What's her real motive? To get your attention, freedom, another man, something else? Discover her true reason(s).
What are you going to do about it? Are you willing to put in the work to get her back in the house or is it not worth it to you? Nothing worth having is easy work, so be prepared to put in the effort.
How are you going to become the husband your wife needs and God expects you to be? Find men and resources to help you grow closer to God and into your role as a husband.
When are you going to start? If your wife is truly trying to get your attention, that's a sign that she's not finished with the marriage and wants things to change. She's willing to give you some time, but that window could close sooner than you think. You'd better get active.
Take these things into consideration, Johnny. If you love your wife and want your marriage to work, show it. Prove to her that you hear her complaints, and that you're going to do your part to make things better.
Kevin B. Bullard, Marriage Works! Founder